Monday, April 13, 2015

Getting Gray

Well look at that.  I almost missed it, but luckily we have little date and time counters in the bottom corner of our computers.  If we didn't I think that maybe I'd forget what year it was entirely.  But time is always moving, even if maybe we aren't.  Or if we maybe don't want it to.

Today's April 13th.  It's my birthday.  I'm sixteen.

I opened up this post and I started writing it cause I figure this is significant but now I don't know what to say.  What does it matter?  I'm just the same person I was yesterday, gaining an extra year hasn't made me any better.

Well, I'm glad that I'm putting this up anyway.  Who knows what's going to happen in the future.  This may be something to help me remember myself.  I don't know.  Birthdays seem important, so I'm glad I didn't forget it.

To another year, and many happy returns.

-Gray

Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Grasping the Kor Concept

As much as I hate to agree with that asshat Fracture, there is one thing he has been right about.

Cordelia is not to be fucking trusted.  Luckily for Gray, I'm keeping an eye out for the both of us.  If it were up to me we wouldn't be living within three states of her, but he needs this right now so I'll deal.  If anything looks even remotely dangerous I'm getting us as far away from this disaster waiting to happen of a group as I can.

I went to visit our lovely red prison guard the other day for the first time.  Gray had been keeping us apart because apparently he was concerned that I'd make a bad impression.  As if I made a bad impression on the other members of the group.  Besides, I kind of went there hoping to leave a bad impression.  Let the bitch know it isn't just the pushover kid she has to get through.

She was completely unrepentant about the way she's using my Gray.  It's disgusting and I will stop her if it goes any farther.  He is not her tool, neither of us are.  She needs to realize that it is a favor that I even allow her to talk to him.  And the lies that pour from her mouth about pacifism and not wanting to hurt people.  Does she realize how fake she sounds?  Seriously, I don't think anyone other than Gray could ever believe her.

I mean, Gray's trusting and naive nature is adorable and I love that about him, but that's why he needs to listen to me when I, as the common sense between us, tell him NOT TO TRUST HER.  But he's busy being a hopeless idiot.  Sigh.  Sometimes loving him is hard.

Ugh, and she reminded me about that bitch Jessica, who I also need to remember to murder.  I owe her a chopped off arm at least but with any luck I'll get to really fuck her up.  She deserves it.  Gray still has nightmares about what she did to him, and I don't blame him.  

BUT THE MAIN THING I'M PISSED OFF ABOUT IS THIS CRAFTING THING.

If you knew Gray like I did you would know that filling his head with delusions of grandeur is a really bad idea.  He breaks down.  It's what he does.  It's all I can do to keep him pulled together, like herding freaking emotional cats.  And now he's got some weird freaky power where he can change the world with his mind?  That's not stable, that's not helping.  I know how to help him and taking away the solidity of reality is not helping his ability to keep a grasp on it.

If The Red Bitch keeps pushing him to fuck with the universe and he keeps doing it and hurting himself inside I'm going to stop it.  I'm going to shut it the fuck down.  His destiny or not his fucking destiny, if it is hurting him IT WILL STOP.

So yeah, if you're reading this Cordelia, and I hope you are, watch yourself.  And watch yourself around Gray most of all.  He's mine and I will protect him.

-The Kor